i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
