My friends, they love my intelligence
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
