so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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