walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
God I need to hump something, right now.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
