i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
True college students do jello shots in the library
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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