He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
