you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
