you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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