Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize