That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
