we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
