did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
