Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Randomize