It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
