4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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