I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
