I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
