If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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