Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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