Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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