I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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