well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Randomize
