she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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