Dual....:-)
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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