So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
