he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Let's get the cat blown out
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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