is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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