Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
As shirtless as possible
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
