He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
