Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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