How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
