I think scott just propositioned me for sex
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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