I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
