No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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