What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize