it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
