if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
