I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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