I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
