I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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