): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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