My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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