bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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