around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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