glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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