would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
