So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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