I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
