you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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