It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I want to make a zoo with you.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize