Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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